I am a Vata/Pitta. He is a Kapha.
What should I know about our doshas to facilitate our love, communication, and sex life?
In this post, I’ll introduce you to the best Ayurvedic Love Tips for Healthier Relationships for Vata, Pitta, and Kapha so you can thrive with your love.
In Ayurveda, we are generally categorized in three doshas, depending on our physical, mental, and emotional characteristics. These are Vata, Pitta, and Kapha. If you don’t know yours yet, do this quiz.
Going a little dipper, we can find more than just one dominant dosha. In my case, I am Vata/Pitta. And I am married to a Kapha sweet man. We’ve been happily together for over 11 years and let me tell you, the tips you’ll find here today, do help.
In our relationship, I am the crazy one.
And he is the calm to my storm.
I come up with lots of ideas —crazy ideas.
He makes them work, for the most part, after carefully organizing the logistic and financial aspects.
I am impatient.
He waits for me until I am ready. To talk, to engage, to look at him.
But, as much as I am the red pepper in our relationship, he also benefits from my inner fire. When he feels slow to take decisions, I am the one pushing him to give the first step.
I believe Ayurveda has helped us both to know our love templates and boundaries. And be okay with them. And also, to identify some quick strategies to get out of a argument fast, to sparkle things up if they get a little boring, or to have engaging, deep conversations that make us feel both like we are dating for the first time.
So, let’s start with understanding what it means to romantically date each dosha.
What to expect if you are dating a…
With a Vata you will never get bored. They are exciting, spontaneous, and love change — which can be a problem in the long run. They are like the wind, always volatile, moving, unexpected. They are fun and super creative. If you like adventure, dating a Vata is always a good idea. Conversations with Vatas are interesting and engaging. But… they are also very inconsistent, hypersensitive, and nervous and tend to have light sleep, cold hands and feet, and suffer from anxiety.
Some of the perks you’ll get by dating a Pitta is punctuality, predictability, and clear and strong opinions. You will also experience their immense intelligence and sharp humor, and their competition traits. Also, wanna binge on that chocolate cake? Your Pitta partner is the best to do it with you. And with a Pitta, fire will always surround your bed. They are passionate, like no other dosha! You can feel their sparks just by looking at their eyes.
A Kapha is the best listener. They are honest, sincere, and loving. They can be the rock you need in difficult times, unconditionally. Sweet, affectionate, always in search of a hug. They love to eat well and live a life of comfort. Plan the best of vacations with your Kapha lover and learn how they never lose their cool. If your loved one is reliable, dependable, and fully committed, chances are she/he is a Kapha.
Relationships often start due to the physical attraction felt among two people. When you are initially attracted to somebody else, chances are the least of your worries is their dosha. And that is perfectly normal.
Regardless, all combinations of doshas can eventually work out if a sattvic mindset is cultivated. If you feel balanced and strive to feel peace and purity in your heart, most likely you will get along with almost everybody, even after the initial love intoxication subdues and you are left with the real version of your partner. Vatas can be adorable and exciting, Pittas can drive you crazy with love and passion, and Kaphas can be the stable partner you have been looking for.
Keeping them happy 🙂
A happy Vata
- Give them a massage with sesame oil and a few drops of patchouli.
- Take them to dance on a Friday night
- Don’t ask them to multitask. Let them focus on one task only.
- Touch their hair.
- Book a vacation at a paradise spot like Costa Rica or Mexico.
- Practice Yin Yoga together.
- Plan a romantic picnic.
- Refrain from bringing up the past
- Honor their spiritual path
- Say lots of sweet words and compliments
- Commit to nonviolent communication
- Write a letter to them expressing all your love and gratitude for who they are
A happy Pitta
- Take a bath together
- Ignite your sex life by engaging in erotic foreplay
- Massage their feet slowly with coconut oil
- Listen to them attentively about their day
- Have an ice cream date
- Workout together. Try to engage in similar sports so they can “compete” and nurture that side of their personality.
- Honor their time
- Honor their sense of humor
- Try to avoid heating debates. Look for a peaceful resolution.
- Don’t get engaged in ego-battle and power struggles.
- Take them out for a date at the light of a candle. So romantic!
- Make intimacy a priority.
- Infuse the relationship with romance: poetry, flowers, chocolates, flirtation, hand-holding, and surprise dates.
- Watch the sunset together.
- Be an inspiration and take care of the smell of your mouth.
A happy Kapha
- Have a cardio session together outdoors
- Bake a cake for them — occasionally!
- Surprise them with a healthy breakfast in bed
- Hike together in a park
- Accept their regular kissing and affection
- Establish routines and stick, as a couple, to them.
- Be patient with them.
- Help build the foundation of your relationship by getting gradually more committed.
- Wake them up early with lots of kisses
- Invite them to bike around town
- Dry brush their skin
- Let them feel wanted and desired with passionate words and body language.
- Refrain from watching TV more than a couple of nights a week. Find other plans to get them moving.
- Watch the sunrise together
What is your favorite tip to apply with your lover?